Kudos to the ‘Lil Champ’

Many, friends and foes, lament that this column always focusses on the negative. Can't help it. These tickles are meant to entertain the readers, while I'm not sure what it does to the subjects. But in deference to those who complain that it's too negative, I've decided to begin with a negative about some positive news -- World Championship winning feat of little Nitish Belurkar. Only, the negativism is aimed at my own, the press corps.
A boring double century by Sachin Tendulkar makes front page news on almost all newspapers. But Nitish Belurkar, the std IV student from Sharada Mandir School who did Goa and India proud by becoming the joint world school champion in chess, finds himself confined to an obscure section of the local dailies.
World champion at 9 years of age. Vow! But unfortunately for Nitish, chess is not cricket, and he's not yet a Vishwanathan Anand, for media-owning and patronising businesses to make him their brand Ambassador.
Nevertheless, here's toasting the little champ and wishing him all the best to climb greater heights in the world of chess to make Goa and India proud.

The Secret diary of Mickky
Page I:
I was getting dejected and nervous. Application after application, was being rejected by the judges, only aggravating my jaundice, blood pressure and blood sugar problems in the confines of my police cell. The phony diet, cockroaches scurrying all around the place, and that naughty little mouse that kept coming and going, taking the mickey out of me, didn't help either.
One of my days in the cell with my thinking cap on, this thought came to my mind: 'No one can have such a long run of bad luck. There’s something ominously wrong. The referees aren’t playing fair, and I guess, I need to disband my legal team, just as I disbanded Fransa-Pax mid-way into the National League.”
Telepathically, Betalbatim reacted. Even Viola couldn’t stop the maurading supporters from booing and heckling my team outside the High Court where my team lost the match for bail. Can’t blame them, can I? After all, they were only emulating their master who’s bull run has to date scalped a KTC driver, a cop at the Hospicio junction and an Electricity Dept Junior Engineer at Fransa House in Betalbatim.
And what I thought, in that dingy prison cell at Sada sub-jail came right. In the first attempt, my Legal Team II won its first outing and I got to say good-bye to jail. And how! Hoards of my supporters were there, who garlanded me and Viola. The euphoria was so much that Viola and I, felt very much like what Winnie and Nelson Mandela must have felt on that historic February 11, 1990 on Robben island.
Page II:
There was this one other day, when I was removed from police custody and sent to judicial custody in Sada sub-jail, that I saw a political opportunity. After all, in politics there are no permanent friends or enemies, so the very prospect of meeting my tormentor-in-chief at the 2007 hustings in Benaulim John Fernandes at Sada, instantly brought this thought to my mind: How about making friends?
With Valanka striding all over the place dishing out fertilizer bags and what not, it reminded me of the 'Trojan' strategy I successfully played out in Saligao, in my pre-2007 cabinet stint to give my boss Dr Willy a taste of defeat. Clearly, the political sand was shifting and I could do with a friend like John to tackle this woman lawyer. They put me in a cell at Sada jail and behold, I was face-to-face with the man! I tried to force a smile, but he didn't respond. Perhaps he's not forgiven me for my driving around the Colva police station with the Russian flag flying on my Hummer that December night.
Then, something unexpected happened. There I was chatting and instantly drawing up plans with John for the next innings in Benaulim. After all, the world knows that I can have as many women as I want, but when fighting one I get all so messy. And John is the perfect weapon to be unleased on Valanka. I was wholly disappointed when I woke up and discovered that I was in my cell and all the John talk was only a dream. Unfortunately, as luck would have it, I got bail from Court and couldn't even give a try to realise my previous night's dream.
(As imagined by this columnist)